Be Greedy

I know, it's Thanksgiving and this is the time of year we make feeble attempts to teach our kids to be GRATEFUL, not GREEDY! But stay with me.  My title will soon make sense, hopefully.  So, I'm the director of local orphan care at my church, Overlake Christian Church  in Redmond.  (By the way, I know what you're thinking... and yes, it IS the best job in the world).  One of the ministries we just launched is called iBelong - Backpacks With A Purpose.  A few of us foster parents got together and were so broken hearted to see kids come into our homes with nothing but the clothes on their backs or a garbage bag filled with a few items.  We decided to do something about this and started collecting backpacks filled with basic needs that a child might have. 


Then a friend of mine who works for the state connected me with a supervisor in the Child Protective Services unit.  He was delighted to get some backpacks so I gave him half of the 32 backpacks we had collected so far.  Before dropping them off, I asked him how many backpacks he wanted and he replied, "I don't want to be greedy but I'd like a few of each age group and gender if possible".  Wow.  I instantly felt a deep sense of sadness and regret that the Church is not a place where social workers think to go to ask for assistance with meeting the basic needs of our orphaned and vulnerable kids.   


God’s Word has lots to say about meeting the basic needs of those who are without.  First of all, Philippians 4:19 says “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”  Deuteronomy 10:18 says that "He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing."  Finally, Psalm 68:5 says "A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation."

Now, I don’t know about you but I would think that God’s holy habitation on earth is His Church.  He’s a father to the fatherless and a judge of the widows IN HIS CHURCH.  There’s a sign that was posted around the church over the last few weeks that said, “Don’t Just Do Church, BE the Church”.  I think if more of us were to “BE the Church, this CPS worker wouldn’t feel bad going to the church and being greedy when asking for needed items for these kids.  Yes, being greedy for our selfish pleasures is a sin but being greedy for the things of God, for justice for our orphaned and vulnerable children, is truly at the core of God’s heart and His Word. 

As I meditated on this whole idea of being greedy for the things of God, I stumbled across a Sermon titled "Greedy For God" that was posted on the website of Grace Evangelical Lutheran Church in Milwaukee.

“In the parable of the tenants in Matthew 21, a landowner sent his own son to collect rent from a mad mob of murderous farmers with weapons. Here’s why: he was greedy for the good of his harvest. Zeal for collecting every last bit of his harvest made him send even his own son. Greed – even good greed – leads to such extremes! A father sending his own son! Greedy to collect you and every last soul in the harvest of his kingdom, God sent his Son Jesus Christ… God is greedy in his love for you.

So greed, if directed properly, can be good. Be a greedy friend and “put no stumbling block in anyone’s path,”… Be a greedy parent “in hard work, sleepless nights, and hunger,” so greedy for your children to see caring, uncriticizing love that you’ll give up your own desires. Be a greedy giver who is “poor” because your greed is for others to be blessed by your generosity “making many rich.” Be a greedy disciple of Jesus “having nothing” because you choose not to accumulate too many toys of this world, greedy instead for Christian living that is “possessing everything” (2 Corinthians 6:3-10).  Be greedy for God because he is and always will be greedy for you.”

Let’s pray for the day that our CPS workers and others who care for our orphaned kids can be greedy for the basic needs of these children.  Let’s pray for the day that the Church can meet the needs of every child so well that our state workers will one day ask us with expectant hearts rather than reluctant hearts.  Let’s be greedy for the harvest of what God is doing for our kids in our community.  Let’s ask the Lord with expectant hearts, not reluctant hearts, to equip us and provide for all our needs according to His riches in glory so that we can be used by Him to provide for the needs of every child. 


Be greedy for justice, be greedy for God!  Be greedy for His harvest that is coming through those of us who are following after Him and serving in orphan care.  Let’s dream of a day when the state CAN knock on our Church doors and be greedy for our kids.


Harvest Blessings to you!!!

Friend vs Birth Mom

So, I just had one of those amazing conversations with my son’s birth mom. She let me know that I could just introduce her as my friend rather than my son’s birth mom. Earlier at church I introduced her as my friend and Ike’s birth mom, as I have done countless times over the last 9 years. So when Melissa suggested this, I brushed it off like it was no problem at all but inside I became a bit unsettled. Why did I feel a need to introduce her as more than just a friend? Throughout the day and into the next week, I wrestled with this and the Lord began to give me clarity.

From my perspective, calling Melissa my friend is like introducing my mom as a friend. Can you imagine introducing your mom as just a friend? That is unthinkable in my eyes and would lessen the value placed on our relationship. So over the years I have struggled to clearly communicate Melissa’s connection with our family. She’s so much more than a friend and as meaningful to me as a family member. She’s my son’s birth mom. She’s biologically related to my son. Anyone biologically related to one of my immediate family members is called a relative.

But then, I began to think about this word, "friend", and it hit me. This descriptor might just be the best word to use when introducing someone as important to me as my son's birth mom. I thought for a minute about the words we use to describe God. Father, not a problem. Counselor, absolutely. Savior, yep. Creator, sure. But when I hear someone refer to God as their Friend, I squirm. Calling God my friend is not easy or natural for me to do. As I thought about this fact, I spent some time asking the Lord to show me why this is difficult for me. If I figured out why it's hard for me to call God a friend, maybe it would shed some light on my reluctance to call Melissa my friend.

God began to show me that I find comfort in relationships where there's obvious lines of expectations and roles. God the Father acts as a loving authority figure in my life and keeps me "in line". God the Counselor refines me and helps in tough situations. God the Savior saved me from my sin and deserves my lifetime of service. God the Creator knows all, is all, and created all so I can wrap my mind around the idea of worshipping Him all my days. But friend? There's no if/then, you do this/i do this relationship in a friendship. A friend loves just because. A friend doesn't have authority over another friend, didn't create or save their friends, and certainly wouldn't want to parent their friends. A friend just is.... a friend.  Our value of a friend has been distorted by the excessive use of the word.  Facebook friend, for instance.  Do I really have 275 friends?  Of course not.  That would be quite overwhelming!   Today, we use words like "bestie" or "kindred spirit" to describe our closest friends because calling them a friend just isn't enough.  Our society has cheapened the word "friend" to mean acquaintance so we find other words to describe our actual friends. 

So then I brought my thoughts back to Melissa. The truth is, she is my friend. I love her dearly and appreciate her friendship immensely. Yes, she is my son's birth mom but that title clearly defines roles of responsibility. Melissa gave Ike to us and then she was given the title, Birthmom. Because of what she did for us and for her son, she was given that title. But Melissa is more than my son's birth mom. She's my friend. I love her for who she is and not just for what she did for us. I value her friendship and enjoy spending time with her just for who she is.

I realized that I had it all wrong. Calling my son's birthmom my friend was indeed the most important title I could give her and was the best way to describe our relationship that had gone way beyond the boundaries of Mom and Birth Mom. So, I guess I can get used to calling her my friend.... because she IS my friend!